I need sleep!!!!!

Alright people, I'm seriously about to lose my mind! What's the problem you ask? My nine month old demon baby Riley! Oh don't get me wrong, she's adorable as hell and sweet and lovable as can be. At least during daylight hours. At night, when the rest of the house is peacefully slumbering she turns into a milk guzzling, use Mommy as a binky, screaming demon. I can actually time her, every two hours. At her age there's really no reason for her to be waking up this often. She use to sleep anywhere from four to six hours straight but evidently she has a twisted sense of humor. I don't know what to do. I've tried making sure her belly is full before putting her to bed, we have a bedtime routine, and I've even tried giving her a bottle of formula before I go to bed. Nothing works, she's still up in two hours. I considered that it might be teething cause she shows the signs of that so I gave her teething tablets. It didn't help. I really don't think she's that hungry all night. Either she's just really spoiled or she needs extra closeness and snuggling at night. But even that doesn't make sense. I'm with her all the time. Even the brief times that I am away from her, her routine stays the same. There haven't been any major changes in her life that would make her insecure. I'm at the end of my rope. And I'm a little worried about her safety because eventually Hunter and Holly are going to realize that Mommy's grouchiness is their baby sister's fault!

I don't wanna be top dog anymore....

My kids will bypass anybody in our household to get to me, whether they are crying, asking for something, have some little tid bit to share or have already been told no by another adult. No where is safe. Doesn't matter if I'm going pee, in the shower, trying to get something done, or asleep, all I hear is "I want Mommy!" There can be three different adults standing between me and a child, and they will attempt to pass by each of them even while being told no. Evidently, I'm top dog in our house. Sometimes I use this to my advantage like this, other times, I don't wanna be in charge.

I have many examples of this but here's the one that happened today. There's four adults in our house, yes we're out numbered but we're still bigger than them. But that's besides the point. Josh had fallen asleep on the couch, Sir fell asleep on the other end of the couch, and I fell asleep on Riley's blanket on the floor. No judging, I had a huge headache. Dani was in her room with the door wide open. I had just barely dosed off when I got woken up by Jordyn. I don't even know what she was saying other than that she was tattling on Hunter and/or Holly. Here's our conversation.

Me: Jordyn am I the only adult in this house?!
Jordyn:  No, but Sir gets grumpy if I wake him up.
Me: I was talking about Dani! She's awake!
Jordyn: Oh, Ok.

And she skips away.

If this is what it's like being top dog, I don't wanna be anymore...

Sleeping Beauty or Zombie Food?

This was actually written about a month ago, well the first part was, but I've been too busy to post it.

There's nights that my precious little baby absolutely drives me nuts and on those nights, in between dealing with her and her constant need to use me as a binky, I have bad dreams. This happened to me about two nights ago. I spent the whole night in and out of nightmares about zombies. This could also be in response to having withdrawals of The Walking Dead which really needs to start again. But anyways back to the point. It's safe to say I had a very unpleasant night. So when I woke up the next morning to Riley screaming at me, the first thought I had was "Next time I'm letting the zombie eat you!" Now in the event of a zombie apocalypse I'd never really let them eat any of my children but I'm sure you can understand the sentiment!

Other nights, like last night, I find myself up in the wee morning hours to nurse Riley and I find myself just stroking her cheek in amazement at this sweet little miracle nestled in my arms. And I get great satisfaction in knowing that I'm the only one who can have this intimate connection with her and provide her with the perfect nourishment. I had such a difficult time for various reasons when it came to nursing my other children that I'm very reluctant to give it up. Originally I said I'd stop at six months. She turned six months last week. Then I said that I'd stop either when that first tooth came in, she turned a year old, or she could "help herself". Well, if I'm wearing a spaghetti strap shirt she does try to get things going on her own! Maybe she's watched too much Walking Dead herself since she's always trying to eat me... I guess that's another post.

Then we switch back to Riley being zombie food. Her allergies give her so much trouble. No matter what I do my poor baby can hardly breath. On nights like that, which happens to be tonight, after listening to her scream all day long because she can't get comfortable enough to sleep, and not letting me out of her sight long enough to even pee, by the time I attempt to put her to bed I'm about all out of patience. I know it's not her fault that she's acting like a life sucking demon but a person can only take so much without losing their sanity! Crap, I think the other kids already took that! Some days I think they have special meetings, including the baby, where they discuss new ways of making mommy lose it! See, I can't even stay on subject!

Well before my sweet little zombie bait wakes back up, I better go take a shower. I have a feeling it's going to me a long night! Sweet dreams...